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I did it! On Monday the 13th at 3am in the morning I gave bi..
🕑 Added 2023-11-19 16:00:16 +0000 UTC I did it! On Monday the 13th at 3am in the morning I gave birth to my beautiful babyboy - in my bed, in my home with only my best friend @atenart squeezing my hand and a midwife quietly observing what would be the most excruciating, awakening and life-changing moment of my entire life. I didn’t know human beings could endure this kind of pain. I didn’t know trapped in your own body feeling nothing but pain would be hell on earth. I died that night. The old version of me died. Every moment of pain and suffering up until that moment - forgotten. Every worry, every heart-break, every problem - forgotten. After 4 hours of non-stop screaming, thinking this was worse than death, thinking all I wanted was to faint to not suffer anymore, I was truly traumatised. I could not speak, I couldn’t think. I just lied there in absolute shock, absolute horror, looking at my son. And I knew I had shed my skin. I was reborn. Now it would be him. And nothing and no one else… my body was his. My life was his. Giving birth is the greatest sacrifice one could make. You break, your body gets destroyed. You go far beyond your limits, beyond anything you thought was possible. There are no words to describe what I have gone through nor to describe how I feel now. The love, the responsibility, the dedication. The feeling of giving up your own life, your comfort, everything for someone else. Knowing you would kill for your son. Die for your son. This is beyond love….
